The "Honeymoon" Period

It's my opinion that every relationship has a "honeymoon" period where everything is blissful and perfect. In this period, people are great to each other, overly compromising, and show a lot of patience and tolerance and attention. This is when you get the person they want you to see to keep you around instead of the real person that you will get over time. It has been my experiences that this period of time doesn't go away until the relationship experiences the first conflict. It seems that the first conflict tends to make that person seem a little bit human and not the mythical, "too-good-to-be-true" individual you knew before the conflict. From a male's point of view, all of the patience and understanding and coolness of the girl is gone. From a female's point of view, all of the attentiveness and passion and desire disappears. Now instead of both people going above and beyond to impress the other, you have two people weeks/months/years later showing exactly who they are for the very first time. Note: it is easy to be perfect when things are going great, but it is those moments of conflict and discomfort that causes people to migrate to their natural self.

The unfortunate truth about this is that some may latch on to a person during this honeymoon phase and make decisions based on who they are exposed to at that moment. I can't count how many people (including me) have said "I didn't know who she/he was until...". What's funny to me is that so many people feel that there is an easy solution to this...be yourself from the beginning. It sounds easy, but it's not so simple. I believe 99% of people are NOT themselves when they meet someone for the first time...even those who swear they are. They may not be trying to be someone else, but they are definitely a better version of themselves. This is human nature.

One thing I have learned is that there is value in patience. I can recall early in life that I was in such a rush to get to a certain place and neglected to take my time to allow things to develop naturally. This was very evident in early relationships. Time brings experiences and conflicts. Time will show you if the person you are with is right for you. Time will expose the actual person underneath the layer that they want you to see.

Moral of the story: You don't truly know a person until you fight them. (for real...Google it)

And as always, just my thoughts.